It’s not about resolving, getting a FitBit, setting a goal or quitting anything. You don’t have to join a program, invest lots of money or lose any weight. Here is what I propose:

1.) Let it go.

Yep, cue Idina Menzel. Just like in the movie, Frozen, where Elsa let go of her fears, the expectations of others, and her beliefs about what she should be — when we drop the beliefs, fears and attitudes that we are gripping onto tightly but that are not serving us, we free ourselves up to be who and what we are here to be. We find how to use our magical powers for good.

How do we know what is not serving us? It’s the repeated thought that causes daily angst, the judgment that bars relationship with another, the fear that won’t allow us to follow a heart’s desire.

In my first marriage when I let go of the belief that my husband had to stop drinking for me to be happy, and the one that said that he “should” stop drinking for me… I found happiness. I found that I was actually the source of it! That was freedom, and magical power.

2.) Accept.

Everyone and everything. As it is right now. We can still decide to act after the acceptance. But first, accept. Seeing the reality of a situation and the truth of a person, not what we wish would be or think could be, gives us a clarity that is often fogged by expectations and the desire to control.

Again, I think of my first marriage. I knew what a wonderful person my husband was and figured that if and when he quit drinking, we could have a happy life. But that made me unhappy and in a state of wanting things to change. That led to attempts to control, ultimatums, arguments and resentment. When I completely accepted the truth of my situation, each day I would ask myself, “And is this Ok with me today?”  And it was. I was able to see the good, and to enjoy my life and my partner.

I let go of all expectation and instead accepted the reality of how he was at the time and took logical steps for myself. Rather than expecting that he would come home after work, for example, I decided what I wanted to do with my time. Resentment faded. In Al-Anon they have a saying, “Expectations are planned resentments.”

Each day I accepted, and one day that situation was no longer Ok with me. I was clear that I wished to free myself to be open to a more intimate partnership. Which is my reality now.

3.) Be Still.

I start yoga classes with everyone sitting, still. I guide them to their breath and to scanning their bodies for energy, sensation, emotion. It may be the first time all day they sat, still, and felt. The mind is mostly busy, frenetic even. So, when we stop and drop our awareness into the body it can be shocking to find that there is peace available, here and now. Or that there is anger that has something to teach us. Or that there is sadness underneath our anger that has something to say.

I have found that being still is necessary for me to not get caught up in the stories my mind spins and begin to believe them as the only truth. In stillness, even for a few minutes a day, I touch my spirit or my soul or my energy. She reminds me that all is well. She offers wisdom and ideas. She guides me with a gentle hand and soft voice.

4.) Envision.

From that place of connection to our Selves and acceptance of what is and having let go limiting beliefs — we can dream. It’s then time to expand into what could be. Name what you desire. Imagine it. That is the beginning of creation. There will be steps to take. And they will be more clear if we allow ourselves time to envision that which we wish to experience.

My friends and I like to play “Wouldn’t It Be Nice If”, a game I heard of from Abraham-Hicks work. We say, “Wouldn’t it be nice if…” and finish with what we can dream of or imagine being. It allows us to hold it gently but to plant its seed.

Of course there are other ways to envision, like guided meditation and vision boards and Pinterest boards. I think of it less like trying to manifest things and more like taking responsibility for my life and experiences. It’s using the mind’s power proactively rather than waiting and reacting to what comes.

5.) Give.

Give what you want to have. Give want you want to experience. If we can identify our primary complaint or negative thought, like “No one listens to me” or “I don’t have enough”, that can be a place to start the giving.

What would happen if the person feeling unheard listened to everyone, became the best listener, and listened to herself?

What would happen if the person without enough intended to give whatever he could to others — stuff, time, help with doing things?

What happens when we give is that we affirm the existence of that which we are giving. We begin to see it and experience it for ourselves. When we give love we are reminded that we are made of love. We wake it up inside ourselves.

So, imagine it… a year where you are free from limiting thought and from judging others, where you feel connected to your Wisest Self, where you envision great things coming and you experience your abundance.

Wouldn’t that be the Best. Year. Ever. ?

 

To join Alise Christie and me on retreat to start your year off with an extra bang, reserve your space today. Here is the BEST. YEAR. EVER Retreat website.